The Minute

The Minute

And when the moment came to collect the minute you have begged life, and God to grant you,  the one minute you thought it could never come again, the impossible minute,  the minute came.  Against all the odds, reaffirmed by that overwhelming silence that came day after day, month after month, year after year, the minute  was now  yours to collect.

The news came as a surprise, like the incredulous winner of the lottery,  I read and read the confirmation correspondence, and in my chest there was only room for my tachycardia, and in my lungs there was only room for hyperventilation, After that, came confusion, the inner moral camp began. Minutes, hours, days of deliverance. Long conversations with the third party this issue now also concerns.

And when the moment came to collect the minute one has begged God to give us, things got even more complicated. As if past and current emotions were not enough, the air of new arrived.

I thought about my minute, the most worthy minute of them all. I grabbed it in my mind and in my heart,  but I froze, I collapsed, I got afraid, I had to say no, and then I cried, cried the same old bitter tears I have cried so many times before, and even if my mind had millions of arguments to convince me to say no,  every inch of my body, and that part of my  heart, my poor bleeding heart, bled again  from those three vertical  veins, one long across them.  Yes, I bled from the ungraspable eternity you left in my chest.

And I let the minute go... tears.

Stavanger  19,20,21 January  2010/15

-I-I-I-